If you have a crisis in a marriage or relationship that requires intensive intervention, our trained counseling team can work with you to design a program that seeks to expose the rooted issues. We have worked with families in crisis in a professional treatment environment for over fifteen years, navigating two people’s experience through love, empathy, grace and redemption. We can this weekly or through intensives, depending on availability and need.
This process goes far beyond “he said, she said” or a referee format. Instead, it asks that both spouses engage the heart, latch onto the perspective of Father God and each other; and work on their individual brokenness as much as the broken parts they see in each other.
A marriage is two people joined together to become one. Each story is pertinent, each background impactful. The life story (personalized for this process) is a way to have a sacred space to process your own story, and then decide how to share it with your spouse.
Our Story
Marriage has its own story, its own dreams, its own vision. It started with romance and ideals, but along the way it meets difficulties, snags and betrayal. The story may get messy, but it deserves to be honored, remembered and told in its true form.
God’s Design
The spiritual protocols and design of marriage is not a list of standards to perform, but a revelation of His heart and ways. Coming into agreement with this gives both partners an opportunity to view His heart – not judge defectiveness in self or the other. God’s ways are redemptive – thus having this shared vision gives hope.
Cycles of Pain
Marriage enter into cyclical patterns, ways of functioning and managing to cope with pain and difficulties. Each partner takes on a way of managing life and finding ways to defend and self protect. In this module, the couple will identify the core problems and struggle, the pain and the bottom lines they carry.
Intimacy, Shame & Grace
The marriage develops intimate interaction or leads to separation and detachment under the cycle of grace or shame. How each marriage partner manages this impacts all areas of the marriage. This module introduces shame and grace and how interactions can be shifted to be seen and comprehended. Intimacy is developed by grace and vulnerable that is accepted not judged, rejected or shamed.
Roles, Responsibilities & Boundaries
The marriage carries distinct purpose with roles and responsibilities. When roles are disordered, imbalanced or lack boundaries, tensions arise. By defining this, a new strategy can be developed, along with boundary protocols that can deal with what happens when a violation or neglect occurs. God has a role inside the mix, and so His placement also needs to be established.
Forgiveness, Redemption and Hope
The marriage heals through willful choice to forgive and release, while valuing and validated the perspective of the other. Forgiveness is the bridge that keeps the relationship alive and penetrates the devastating result of sin and violation. It doesn’t give a “free pass” to remain in bad behavior – but it chooses to let someone off the hook, to try again.
Meeting Needs, Conflict and Communication
Expressive communication needs to be generated that validates need, deals with conflict in healthy ways and develops new venues to exchange life issue together. Conflict rules and strategies as well as methods of sharing issues will be established.
Marriage Meetings:
Developing long-term healing, alignment, hope and balance. Retaining relational sobriety is an agreement of what new normal looks like, what to expect and how to align it. It is the ongoing recovery and healing plan for the marriage. These meetings can be facilitated at first, but they are meant to be the bridge that holds the marriage together for the long haul – a special place to make healing and communication a place of safety and connection, giving the marriage a priority.
If you work in the ministry or through a church, we are specially geared for this dynamic. We suggest asking your church for financial assistance. A healthy marriage is vital for ministry and should be at the heart and soul of priorities. If you don’t get help from us, please get help somewhere.
28481 Rancho California Road | Suite 101 | Temecula, CA 92590
Copyright 2021. Spirit of Life Recovery. All Right Reserved.
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